Around my sixth month anniversary with the entertainment pr firm, I was feeling really good about life. The job as a Junior Account Executive was a perfect fit for me where I could make use of all the things I got in trouble for doing as a teenager. Namely, going to parties, talking on the phone and writing. I was still reeling from the incident where my Mother read my journal (see previous blog entry called The Journal) but the writing I was currently asked to do was not personal; I had to write press releases and prepare monthly updates. Plus, I got to work with Gretchen Wyler, my new hero promoting The Fund For Animals.
My future looked bright! I started thinking about dating again, determining the best way to get myself out there. My pound mutt Blondie was happy and healthy and the office was close enough for me to drive home during my lunch break and take her on an afternoon walk. We were both getting in the groove of our new life, gaining confidence every day.
“Susan, Blaine and I need to talk to you,” Harvey said as I arrived at the office one morning. Oh no, I thought, immediately getting that sinking feeling. This can not be good. I tried to wipe the look of complete terror off my face as I slowly I walked into the office where they were both sitting. Then they motioned for me to close the door behind me, which was a really bad sign. I knew business was slower than it was when I was originally hired and there was only one client left in my “anything that pays” division. I had successfully completed a book tour, finished promoting the Los Angeles stop of the American Ballet Theater's tour with Mikhail Baryshnikov and was continuing to work with The Fund For Animals. I figured we would begin the process of getting new clients for me to work on but that was not the case. The partners had decided to focus solely on the entertainment industry and my being a "generalist" did not fit with their view of the future.
So, for the first time in my life, I was laid off. Even though partners Harvey and Blaine kept saying their decision was nothing personal, it felt very personal to me; I was being abandoned like the dogs I saw at the pound on the morning of my first press conference. The confidence I had found completely disappeared.